A Complete & Utter Loss For Words…

In Personal, Random on February 6, 2013 at 8:47 pm

This ^ is where I’m at right now.  And  those of you that have followed my blog for a bit could probably attest to the fact that this is not normal…

Big news in my world is that I randomly and unexpectedly received a notification on my phone today that I had been mentioned in a Tweet by Freshly Pressed for a recent post I had done.  I thought to myself “That’s strange.  Freshly Pressed is big news for WordPress.  But this is Twitter…”  So I load up my Twitter, expecting it to be something random (since the only Tweets I get mentioned in are the fake accounts promoting porn), but I find that it is, indeed, Freshly Pressed.  I’m still thinking, “Okay, okay.  But it’s not the Freshly Pressed.  There’s no way.”  I expand the Tweet to see that it’s already been retweeted twice.  I figure I should probably promote myself a bit, even if it is a mistake, so I retweet it, too.

Then I open my WordPress app.  Mind you, the WordPress app is insanely finicky and often just crashes.  It’s nearly impossible to do anything aside from using the reader on it, but it does send notifications if someone comments on one your posts, but checking notifications and replying to comments more or less turns into a fiasco for me every time.  For any of you that see a comment or a reply with a typo in it, it’s because of my blasted phone and its horrible attempt at autocorrect and it makes me want to scream.  So generally I tend to only use the phone app to read other blog posts.  I tap on the FP icon and it loads up the page – with my little letter right at the top – and I almost immediately begin getting comment notifications.

I just checked my stats for the day and again, I don’t even know what to do with myself.  As of right now, I have had 531 visitors – 1036 views – spread out across 13 countries.  I jumped up to 95 follows and now have 481 likes.  An Undelivered Letter – To My Loved One specifically has been shared on Facebook 3 times, one of my funny nuggets and another post about my college career and how I’ve ended up where I am now were both shared on Reddit, and 2 of my posts were shared via Press This.

I had a very scheduled and long work day today, so I didn’t get to really sit down and go through it all until around 6 or so nd I’m still not done.  I am overwhelmed with all the positive feedback and heart-felt comments from people who have dealt and are still dealing with their own losses.  Because I don’t often open up this much and I took a chance with this one on a whim, it means so much more that this was picked to be FP.  Because this is something so close to my heart, and because I feel that this is important for any blogger in general, I have set about to replying to each comment I have received.  I have spent the last hour viewing the blog of every person that liked the post (or other posts that my FP status led them to) and I’m nowhere near done with that.  I have found some very nice blogs so far, though!

I keep replying to comments with gratitude and trying to make a more personal response, but I literally don’t know what to say other than thank you.  It is greatly appreciated, beyond understanding, that each one of you took the time to read my blog posts, whether it was the letter or any of my other pointless ramblings.  It means a lot to me that this personal piece of my life was so appreciated by others.  It’s bittersweet that this letter was picked to be FP.  I still struggle with the loss, but I have noticed it getting better.  I find myself more able to smile when a memory pops up instead of automatically bursting into tears.  I find myself less angry at the things that could have happened or should have happened or that I should have done and more happy that the time had been given to me in the first place.  But this heartbreaking event in my life led me to this point in which this person that was so important to me but what taken away prematurely gives me yet another reason to be grateful for having them and for the experiences they gave me.  I surely would have been a different person today without them, good memories and painful ones alike, and I know they would be supportive of my writing, so it is fitting.

So again, I say thank you to all of you that have taken a few minutes of your day to read, comment, and share your own insights.  Being in pain is hard.  Seeing others in pain is hard.  But one can find an odd comfort in knowing that we are all not alone in it.

  1. Your blog that was Freshly Pressed honored was outstanding, and deserving of the recognition. I could feel the pain coming from my monitor; that’s the kind of emotional writing I always go for.

    Congrats on being Freshly Pressed. I’m still enjoying my FP status since last week – I too was taken completely by surprised by the sudden traffic my blog was receiving. Enjoy your status and keep up the good blogging!


    • Thank you so much! This is probably the most honest and raw thing I will ever write in my lifetime, so I’m pretty proud of myself for the amazing response I’ve gotten to it.
      And congrats on your FP!


  2. That was an excellent post today. Thanks so much for sharing it. I
    really enjoyed reading it very much. I’ll be sure to pass it along to others.

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  3. Really that ” An Undelivered Letter To A Loved One” is a great piece. Best I’ve read in a long time cos it depicts the picture of what I went thru when a close friend died. I felt I should have been a better friend but I didn’t. Thanks for sharing it. God bless.


    • I think the automatic human reaction to a major loss is to somehow place blame on oneself by saying “I should have done this” or “I should have been a better…”


  4. I didn’t comment on your FP post, just because I felt like anything I could say would just be redundant or come across superficial. But it was a very emotionally powerful piece and well-deserving of being featured. Congrats on the FP! It’s a wild ride for sure so hang on tight as you observe the mass influx of readers and subscribers alike. 🙂


  5. Good on you! It was through FP that I found you, and I am so glad they chose your blog. I think you are just damn awesome. Thanks again for sharing.


  6. I shared your post on Facebook: I thought it was beautiful. I hoped it would reach my husband, for he and I are at odds. Unfortunately, it only touched me. Still, I am grateful. For when I read your post, I felt how important it was to cherish my love for him, even if it feels unrequited.

    Thank you for soothing my spirit.


    • Thank you so much for reading and taking the time not only to respond, but to share it as well. I am sorry that you are going through a hard time, but it will work out one way or another and whether it’s what you wanted originally or thought you wanted, you will be happy in the end. I truly believe that there is a way to find real happiness no matter how hard a situation is as long as you leave yourself open for it to come to you.


      • Don’t misunderstand. I’m doing well. But your post was a gift. No one wants to feel like love was wasted. In reading about your life, you reminded me the importance lies within your own heart.

        Many thanks.


  7. You’re so right, there IS a comfort in knowing you’re not all alone. I found a deep appreciation in your letter that made FP (well-deserved, btw). I too have recently lost someone, truth be told I lost him long ago although just recently made the decision to leave. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and personal piece of you.


  8. I always sppent my half an hour to read this weblog’s articles
    or reviews daily along with a cup of coffee.


  9. Way cool! Some very valid points! I appreciate you writing this post and the rest off the site
    is extremely good.


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Singing Heart

Poems by Karem Barratt


Breaking Free From The Past, In Hope For A Bigger & Brighter Future

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The world is a confusing place, these are just my musings on it.

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